The Last Blond Joke You'll Ever Need
Two blonde girls were working for the Brisbane City Council Parks Department.
One would dig a hole and the other girl would follow behind her and fill the hole in.
They worked up one side of the street,
Then down the other, then moved on to the next street, working furiously all day without rest, one girl digging a hole, the other girl filling it in again, then moving on.
An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn't understand what they were doing. So he asked the hole digger, 'I'm impressed by the effort you two are putting into your work, but I don't get it – why do you dig a hole, only to have your partner follow behind and fill it up again?' The hole digger wiped her brow and sighed,
'Well, I suppose it probably looks odd because we're normally a three-person team. But today the girl who plants the trees called in sick.'
A blonde woman was driving through the Florida Everglades while on vacation.
She wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde declared, 'Well then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator and get a pair of shoes for free!'
The shopkeeper said with a sly smile, 'Well little lady, why don't you go on and give it a try?
The blonde headed off to the swamp, determined to catch an alligator.
Later in the day, as the shopkeeper is driving home, he spots the same woman standing waist deep in the murky water, shotgun in hand. As he brings his car to a stop, he sees a huge 9-foot gator swimming rapidly toward her. With lightning reflexes, the blonde takes aim, shoots the creature and hauls it up onto the slippery bank.
Nearby were 7 more dead alligators, all lying belly up.
The shopkeeper stood on the bank, watching in silent amazement.
The blonde struggles mightily and manages to flip the gator onto its back.
Rolling her eyes heavenward, she screams in frustration, 'Shit!...........This one's barefoot too!'
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